Since You’ve Been Gone

By Claire Rowden

Finding Light in the Darkness — A Sneak Peek at Chapter Seven of Since You’ve Been Gone

Grief has a way of creeping into the quiet moments—the spaces between conversations, the hum of a workday, the silence of a coffee break. But sometimes, healing doesn’t arrive with grand gestures. Sometimes, it sneaks in through laughter, shared glances, and the comfort of someone who simply gets you.

I’m so excited to share a short glimpse of Chapter Seven of Since You’ve Been Gone, which is my baby currently out on submission with agents. This chapter begins in the humdrum pace of Jess’s workday, where everything feels a little too normal for someone whose world has tilted off its axis. But it soon shifts - gently, unexpectedly - into a scene that holds one of my favorite moments in the book.

In the break room, with the hiss of the kettle and the clink of coffee mugs, Jess finds herself momentarily lifted by the presence of her best friend, Deb. What follows is a funny, and hilarious exchange - one of those small pockets of joy that sneak up on you when you least expect it. For a moment, grief loosens its grip, and Jess is reminded that she’s still here. Still laughing. Still capable of feeling something other than loss.

It’s a short scene, but to me, it says so much. About resilience. About friendship. About how we keep going - not by pushing grief away, but by letting joy find its way back in.

Thanks for following Jess’s journey with me. I hope this chapter leaves you smiling - just like Deb did for Jess.

Enjoy…

Claire x

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Seven

…

She walked back to the break room, the cake slice in hand, her mind still buzzing from the conversation. The thought of Matt, though, wouldn’t leave her. She heads for the kitchen hoping a coffee would be a good distraction.

As she poured the hot water into her coffee cup, she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned to find Deb walking in, looking frazzled and clearly in need of a coffee. Deb grabbed a mug and a teabag from the cupboard, a sigh escaping her lips as she plopped herself down into one of the chairs, yawning loudly.

"Ooh, throw some in there for me, please. I’ve had the shittiest day so far," Deb groaned, pointing to her well placed cup beside Jess as she poured the water from the kettle. Jess smiled sympathetically as she added the milk into her tea, adding just enough to make it drinkable. She glanced at Deb, always thankful for someone else’s drama to distract her from her own thoughts. "What’s the matter? Why’ve you had a bad day? It’s not even lunchtime yet."

Deb let out another sigh, rolling her eyes as she looked at Jess, her lips twisted into a grimace. She had that look on her face, the one that said, I’ve really messed up this time.

"Well, you know that guy from accounting?" Deb began, her voice lowering as though she was about to confess something. "The super cute one with the glasses and the Audi?"

Jess raised an eyebrow, intrigued by Deb’s sudden seriousness.

“Yessss, the one who looks about twelve.”

Deb’s laugh filled the quiet room as she slapped Jess’s arm. Jess couldn’t help but grin - she knew exactly where this was going.

“Yeah, that one. But he isn’t bloody twelve, he’s twenty. And his name’s Todd.”

Jess gave her a sceptical side-eye. ‘Uh - huh, Sure he is. Go on, spill. What happened?”

Deb held Jess’s gaze for a beat, then dropped her face into her hands. Jess smirked, already bracing for it. Deb had always been the daring one - the chaos-bringer - and Jess had missed this. The ache in her chest reminded her just how long it had been since they’d had one of these moments. She made a mental note to be a better friend.

“Okay, so,” leaning in, dropping her voice, “you know I went out last night with a couple of the girls - ’

Jess nodded. She knew full well the kind of girls Deb meant: wild, magnetic, always a bad influence in the best way.

“Well, we hit the shots a bit early, got all emotional about God knows what, and decided to ditch the pub and head to the club. And Todd was there.”

Deb grimaced, looking exactly like Wallace from Wallace and Gromit. Jess took a slow sip of her coffee and waited.

“One thing led to another - we literally bumped into each other outside the loos, both of us too pissed to see straight - and he gave me that smirk.”

Deb’s eyes gleamed. She leaned closer, palms flat on the table.

“Dear God, Jess. It undid me.”

Jess burst out laughing, accidentally spitting coffee across the table, narrowly missing Deb’s cream skirt.

Deb scooted back, laughing. Jess wiped her chin with a napkin, grinning.

“Okay, come on. Spill the rest.”

Deb composed herself, leaned in again, that gleam of shameless glee dancing in her eyes.

“We kissed. A lot. Danced. A lot. Then next thing I know, we’re in a taxi, heading back to his place.”

Jess arched an eyebrow but kept quiet.

“It was one of those clothes-flying, don’t-make-it-up-the-stairs kind of nights. Like, sweaty, messy, properly hot. I mean, Jess, the man knew what he was doing.”

Jess couldn’t help but laugh. “Okay, that sounds amazing. Why do you look like you want to crawl into a hole?”

For a second, Deb was silent. Then she let out a full-bodied, uncontrollable laugh, trying to muffle it with both hands. Her face flushed from her chin upward, turning a truly spectacular shade of red.

Jess joined in, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She hadn’t laughed like this in ages.

“Oh no. What went wrong? You’ve got that ‘something traumatic happened to my dignity’ face.”

Deb nodded, still half-laughing behind her hands.

“It was so close to perfect. Like, almost orgasmic. I mean, he was hitting all the right places, and I was on another planet.”

Jess raised a brow and covered her mouth, trying not to cackle.

“We were really going for it - full stairway to heaven vibes. At some point, I vaguely clocked that my arse was getting rug-burned by his stair carpet. But Jess, I was too far gone. He could’ve brought a cheese grater and I still wouldn’t have stopped.”

“Oh god,” Jess wheezed.

Deb grinned through the shame. “And just as it was building - you know, like, building building - suddenly, the landing light flicks on…”

Jess froze mid-laugh, eyes wide. “No.” She was unable to hold back her laughter at this point, enjoying her friends cringy discomfort. Deb hid behind her fingers.

“His mum appeared at the top of the landing, pink dressing gown tied at the waist, fluffy fucking slippers and everything and asks Todd if he wouldn’t mind taking his friend to his bedroom instead of laying all over the stairs, Jess I could have died, we were both pretty much stark bullock naked by this point, halfway up his stairs in the full throws of cataclysmic shagging, and I wasn’t even being quiet because I thought he lived alone.!”

Barely able to breathe, Jess was laughing so hard she had to buckle over holding her sides. Deb, smirking but shame faced sat opposite giggling waiting for her friend to compose herself but also loving the fact that she had made her smile, even at her own expense.

“Oh babe, that is hilarious. What did you do after?” Deb groaned, smirking. “Nothing! I was mortified. His mother had just interrupted us after we had clearly woken her up - can you believe that? And the worst part? I pretended we were just chatting too loudly on the stairs!” Her friends expression, equal parts horror and disbelief was to funny, Jess’s cheeks were aching from all the laughing. “I literally yanked my clothes on, muttered some pathetic excuse, and bolted. He’s been calling me. All. Bloody. Morning!”Jess couldn’t hold back a snort. “Look, you need to let him down gently. Clearly, he thinks you want more - even though you legged it halfway through. This is what happens when you sleep with the pups, babe.”They both burst into full-blown belly laughs again, Deb reaching out to swat Jess across the arm, mock-offended.

Jess couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed like this - proper, stomach-aching, tear-streaming laughter. The kind that left you breathless and cleansed, even if just for a moment. It reminded her how long it had been since she’d felt even a hint of lightness. And she realised, with a pang, just how much she’d missed this - missed Deb, missed herself.She made a quiet promise in that moment: to be a better friend, to let herself be pulled back into life again - even if it was just one laugh at a time.